February 23, 2011
I never really sit downstairs at Vita, as it’s rather loud. But tonight seemed like a perfect night to try it out & watch bundled up Seattlites traipse around in the new snowfall. Upstairs they hunch over their laptops & books; downstairs they chatter. Perfect for one of my favorite guilty pasttimes, overhearing snippets of random conversations, largely without context.
Here are my findings: Whoa! Quite a lot of Capitol Hill have traveled abroad. Or at least, prefers that to be the focal point of their coffee date conversations.
So here’s some gems from the loudest speakers of a day’s worth of tables, the voices which carry even above the clank & clatter of the espresso machines.
• On not being able to name the country of origin of his African heritage: “People have such a narrow view of what ‘African’ is.”
• “I saw Cat Power standing up one time & it was awful. Just standing up.”
• “Well, they’re going to throw a party for us. They’re going to have to. They have to. They will.”
• “Well, you have a week to make your presence known.”
• “I tell them to stop arguing always, but it’s totally futile. He’s always going to keep spreading stupid around.”
• On Oprah: “& she’s definitely beefy… not that there’s anything wrong with that. But it just keeps getting worse, her hair, her clothing. It’s like her people are running around like ‘I don’t know what to do with her! I don’t know! Just wrap her in cotton!'”
• “Making eyes is my favorite thing to do.”
• About man’s large duffel: “Do you have goodies in there?? Is there a unicorn & pie in there?”
• “You didn’t tell me Kesha was playing Key Arena last night. Nobody told me!”
“I want to buy her album. But I have all the songs already.”
• “I’ve been here now for 3 months & I keep thinking, now I can hop on a bus, & go there, or there. Or Germany.”
• An SU student’s ramblings regarding a recent trip:
“Then the bitch drove us out to the desert.”
“This African safari dude got us some…I don’t know what it was, but damn. ‘Hi, my name is Ali.’ That’s all the English he could say.”
“All I knew of Africa was like, Casablanca & Aladdin.”
• “She filled me in on the secret: girls like being liked!”
• “We stayed in Istanbul for five days, & every day ordered progressively more food. On the last day, the dude was like, ‘Where you from?’ We were like, ‘Dude, we’re from California!’ So he was like ‘Don’t you have mussels there?’ & we were like ‘Yeah, in Venice Beach!’”
• “In Granada, they have really really cheap beer and tapas.”
“Tapas is any dish you eat in the daytime.”
• “At one point I felt I knew more gay guys than I did girls. Goddamnit!”
• “I was twenty one for three months, maybe, if that.”
• “Nice, how long have you guys been together?”
“Three months, today!”
“Then what the hell are you doing here with me?”
I’ve been here far too long, consumed far too much coffee. No one’s safe from these ears on Capitol Hill! (Except perhaps those who speak at a reasonable level.) Goodnight! Tonight let’s get all buried in this inch or two of snow.